THE SEVEN PHASES THAT EVERY PARENT EXPERIENCES
Phase 1: The thought that gives you goosebumps.Your biological alarm goes off. Every baby is unbeliveably cute. Am I ready for kids? They are pretty darn cute. Why not? Plus, making babies is quite fun!
Phase 2: Pregnant or not?
The missed period - am I, aren't I? Soon confirmed by the morning trips to the bathroom to meet with you new acquaintances Ralph and Huey. But it is all worth it when you feel that first flutter - was that a kick? Was that his, you-know, on the ultrasound?
Flash forward a few months. The kicks, elbows, backaches, and swollen ankles are part of your daily routine. Gross! Varicose veins. What happened to your body?
Here she comes. Your baby pushes and pushes making you have the mouth of a sailor. During labor you decide to never make babies ever again. But wait, she has ten fingers, ten toes, and a sweet smile.
Phase 3: Creating a "first" for every occassion.
You have lost your precious sleep time. Your nipples are beyond sore and you are going delirious from dieting. However, your precious bundle of joy can harm no one. She is perfect with a perfect smile. She just found her little toes. She tastes them. Maybe she is hungry you laugh.
A long list of first time events unfolds. She sits, crawls, stands, and walks to you all on her own. She can eat solid food and go to the potty. You are filled with immense pride. That is, until she has a tantrum, but the tantrum is only temporary.
Nursery rhymes and pat-a-cake - crucial for child development but, all too often these days, delegated to the TV.
First kindergarten or school: a mixed blessing. Where did my baby go?
Phase 4 Playgrounds, parties and alphabets.
She is no longer your little baby. She goes to school. She wears a uniform that makes her look so independent.
Toilet jokes - everything and anything to do with pooping and peepee is absolutely hilarious!
The first best friend wonderfully appears while the first brush with rejection sadly appears. She has bumps and scrapes from play. She doesn't understand why things are not always fair.
How hard it is to let them go - but you can't protect them from everything.
Stage 5: She hits the books.
Play times fall by the wayside when they have to learn the alphabet and addition. It may be easier for your child or it may feel like the teacher is speaking Chinese. If your child succeeds easily you have a fairly smooth ride ahead of you. If your child has trouble then you will have many potholes on the road called "school".
Despite the tense moments, you will always have the cute moments such as when she spies Santa or wants a frilly doll for her birthday.
The temptation to baby her strong, but you remember she needs to do her chores.
Phase 6: Almost a teenager
Girls will be girls and boys will be boys - and never the two shall mix. Well, why would they? The girls are all into pink and giggle too much - and the boys are just too cool for such silliness.
Clothes. You are just SO out of date mom! No one wears that anymore! And why should it matter if my pants are hanging down by my knees? Mom, these clothes are too small!
Your daughter says popular words that you don't understand.
First bra, first period. Lipstick and makekup. Squeeky voice that breaks. Anti-perspirant.
Phase 7 - "Kevin goes Large"
Suddenly boys and girls are not so alien after all. Does (s)he fancy me?
Suddenly too, your precious child, whom you taught everything, knows more than you. In fact, you apparently, know nothing, and they knows everything!
Parents are out of style while friends are the top of their social list. Your daughter wants to stay out till the wee hours of the morning with friends. Why not? Everyone else is staying out that late.
Special moments arise when you can have a great discussion with your young adult child. Just make sure you listen and don't sound like a teacher.
Your daughter has become an adult with goals, aspirations, and endless energy.
Phase 8 (well, who said I could count?)
Your daughter has gone to college. You worry about her everyday. Did she have a good dinner? Are her clothes clean?
"I'll love you, forever. I'll like you, for always. As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be" - Robert Munsch
Time flies. Take a moment to enjoy the specialness of each and every day with your children.
About the Author
Do your kids play you up? Then you should really check out Dr. Noel Swanson's free newsletter on children's behavior management that is packed with advice. More of his articles can be found here: free articles on parenting